Disability Miss Manners

I’m so glad that I was exposed to people with differing abilities and physical or intellectual challenges, as a very young teen. Volunteering with the United Cerebral Palsy Association, Special Olympics and later, leading recreation programs in my home town school for children with developmental disabilities, allowed me to learn how to relate to people that are different from myself in a very personal way. I saw that it was OK to be inspired, humbled, delighted, tickled to roaring laughter, irritated, confused, and challenged by those interactions - just like every other relationship. Now, I look forward to the opportunity to meet and talk with someone with an obvious “disability” - they are generally the most interesting person in the room.

Unfortunately, I see so many people who are visibly uncomfortable when someone in a wheelchair rolls onto the scene or walks up with a white cane. I know it’s just a fear of not knowing what to do, how to greet them, how not to offend. It’s easier to walk away, ignore them and the situation, than to struggle through an awkward encounter.

However, the reality is that we’re going to find that harder and harder to do. With the Baby Boomers living longer, staying in the workforce, and frankly growing into the many disabilities that come with aging, we had better learn how to engage better. Additionally, thousands of soldiers with physical AND emotional issues are returning to our communities, workplaces and homes, requiring us to ramp up our communication skills and collaborative instincts as professionals, team members, partners and people.

Remember that for every “disability” people have numerous abilities. Remember that we all have some disability or handicap - many of our own making, most not so obvious - that we deal with everyday already. Realize that we have more in common than you think.

Kudos to the San Antonio Texas Disability Access Department for publishing The Disability Etiquette Handbook. It’s a simple, easy to read, straight forward electronic document to give you some guidance on how to meet, greet, and interact with people in various situations with respect and confidence; sort of a Disability “Miss Manners.”

A few years ago I had the pleasure of meeting Gary Guller, the only man with one arm to summit Mt. Everest. His story is astounding and I hope you’ll learn more about him, but he is a person that encourages me. If he can endure the struggle to reach the highest point in the world with one hand, surely I walk across a room and extend my hand to someone different than me - and it may turn out to be as exhilarating.

This entry was posted on November 17, 2010 at 9:40 am and is filed under Articles. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.